What are you hiding? Cmonyou know youre hiding something. Is it that you like anal sex?That you like to have sex with women and men alike? That you are dominant?That you like to be tied-up? What is it? Cmon, you can tell me. Its just between the two of us. I wont tell anyone and youll feel better if you tell someone! Dont believe me? Find a person that you feel is non-judgmental and that you can trust. Tell them, and see for yourself. What? You say thats easier said than done? What if someone SEEMS non-judgmental, and you think you can trust them, but then youre wrong. You certainly wont be feeling much better when your secret is out. You know, youre right. But you know what else? Interestingly, more than likely that person who would be talking about your thing, HAS THEIR VERY OWN THING, TOOand they keep it just as tightly wrapped up as yours. They, too, wonder what others might thinkwonder if theyre a bad person, or if something is wrong with them because their interest isnt in the mainstream of the conservative, OK sexual realm. All the while, though, they have a sense of guilty enjoyment from the pleasure that draws them to do it in the first place. The thing is, though, that while theyre off talking about anothers thing, they keep attention away from they own, and they are SURE TO LET OTHERS KNOW THAT THEY'RE NOT LIKE THAT. Funny how we human beings are, covering parts of ourselves that we actually have in common with others, but dont know it because were too busy hiding it. Id be willing to bet there may even be atleast one person who would read this and say, Not me! Im not hiding anything! If that is you, you might want to consider if you are denying a part of yourself because you feel that its wrong to have the interest/desire/feeling that you have. So, truly you arent really hiding it, but rather just denying itall the while you ARE IT! Interesting, dontja think? Now, of course, I could be off base here. My experience is what I have come to base my thoughts on. It seems to me that sex and sexual matters are the last taboo in our society. It is the one thing that is not supposed to be out there for public consumption. As a pleasurable activity, some would say it isnt even supposed to be there for private consumption. It is one of those things that is being pushed down, pushed aside, covered up, while all the time still living quite a fertile life. Has anyone considered that the more its covered up and hidden, the more it is made the thing that shouldnt be done, the more likely some will want to do it, or try it? Ever do something that you werent supposed to be allowed to do and then wonder what the charge was? Or perhaps you went the other wayyou got a big charge out of it because you were doing something you werent supposed to do? Think about this. People have sex in their office or an elevator, or in other off limits places because theyre off limits. It probably wasnt until someone said; No, this is not acceptable that couples lined up and said, Lets have sex HERE! I wonder how many people would be having sex in these types of places if suddenly anyone could do it anywhere. Now, before you think I support having sex anywhere, let me say, given how things have been, if suddenly it was OK, I would imagine for awhile people would be doing it just about anywhere. But, I would also imagine that the reaction would wear off after a time, and people would cease to do it JUST BECAUSE THEY COULD, but rather because they wanted to. Maybe there would even be a reversion to lets just do this for us behind closed doors. Oftentimes, I think people REACT vs. ACT. They dont realize it at the time. But the minute someone says they cant do something they NEED to do that very same thing. Theres an expression what you resist, PERSISTS. If we as a society resist certain sexual behaviors, they will likely continue on a larger scale than those who are vocal about it would like. On a more personal level, resisting a part of who you are or think you could be will only have that part of you continue to haunt and taunt you. Allow it, and you may find that the driving power it seemed to have diminishing, and youll be free to be or not to be, to do or not to do, and no longer be at its mercy. I realize, again, that this may just sound a little too easy of a solution, while it feels to you to be quite a difficult thing to allow. However, I have had many conversations with people regarding these types of things, and once they released themselves from anothers restraints (opinions and judgments), they found relief. Given the nature of what I have written, I feel compelled to speak to the following: as long as humans continue to make judgments about what they think is wrong, right, good, bad, there will always be a diversity of opinions on the assessments of another, based on anothers relative experience. For that reason, someone can always find a way to justify their own behavior. This article was written with the greatest of respect for people and their sexual nature. It was not intended in any way to promote any sexual behavior or tendencies. Since I care a great deal for others, it is my belief that it is important for us to be true to ourselves, but not to the detriment of another. What has been written here was written in this context, and it is my desire that a person reading this, who has been fighting aspects of their sexual persona, has been provided a prospective that provides an alternative to their current experience. |