Are you and your partner experiencing some form of conflict? Is conflict leading you to avoid each other? When couples feel overwhelmed by conflicts, they find highly creative ways to avoid spending time with each other. When youre not spending time together, its difficult to Co-Create a Conscious Relationship. This assessment helps you and your partner to recognize the avoidance behaviors you do and do not practice. This free set of assessments offers you the chance to find powerful answers. If you are willing to take the time to reflect on these questions, discuss them, and be honest with yourselves and each other, it can help you on your journey to Co-Create a Conscious Relationship so you can be Best Friends During the Day,
Lovers at Night, and
Partners for Life.
The adventure of life gives us the incredible opportunity to learn and grow as individuals. I like to say that we do not stop learning, stretching, growing, maturing, and changing until we are 6 feet under. What happens so often is we go through life unaware that we dont know what we dont know. In this fast-paced world, many of us do not have or take the time to sit, take a deep breath, and really think about the statements addressed in these assessments. We usually do not reflect on and consider the impact the answers to these statements can have on our relationship. We must gain the awareness, learn the techniques, and practice the skills to Co-Create a Conscious Relationship. Take your time to think about each statement and be honest. One partner should use a black pen and the other partner a red pen. Rate your degree of agreement for each statement on a scale from 1 to 10, with 10 being a definite yes and 1 being a definite no. Write your score on the first line to the left of each statement. The second line is for your partners score. You may find it difficult to give certain statements a low score. You may worry that your response will hurt or offend your partner or create conflict. Honesty, however, is critical for the success of the Co-Create a Conscious Relationship program. Also, no matter what score your partner writes down, be supportive; do not get defensive, resentful, or angry. Thank him or her for being courageous and honest. All of the topics in this assessment series are covered in detail, with exercises, in my book The Journey from I-TO-WE. Conscious Non-Avoidance
_____ _____ - 1 - We love to spend our free time together.
_____ _____ - 2 - We do not use any actions or behaviors to avoid each other.
_____ _____ - 3 - We have identified and eliminated any avoidance behaviors or actions.
_____ _____ - 4 - We do not ignore each other by being selfish with our time.
_____ _____ - 5 - We know how to ask for time together.
_____ _____ - 6 - We spend at least 10 hours of WE time per week.
_____ _____ - 7 - We do not lead separate and parallel lives.
_____ _____ - 8 - We both have outside interests that do not interfere with our time together.
_____ _____ - 9 - We enjoy spending the weekends together.
_____ _____ - 10 - We have made a commitment to be available for each other.
_____ _____ - Total Score
You have 10 statements for a total possible score of 100. If your total is: 80 or higher -- You scored in the upper percentile Congratulations! You have obviously taken the time to work, ensuring your relationship has the best chance to be successful. Though your relationship is strong, it can only benefit from gaining new awareness, new skills, and new techniques. Good luck in Co-Creating a Conscious Relationship! 60 79 -- You scored in the average range Congratulations! Re-read the statements you scored low on and take the time to learn how to raise your score. Consider Co-Creating a Conscious Relationshipthrough gaining new awareness, new skills, and new techniques. You and the relationship will be much stronger on The Journey from I-TO-WE. 0 59 -- You scored in the lower range Congratulations! You now know where you need to take the time to closely examine these areas of your relationship. It would benefit both of you to think about these statements, and work toward Co-Creating a Conscious Relationship through gaining new awareness, new skills, and new techniques. Commit to each other to give unselfishly and unconditionally to do whatever you need to do to make each other feel safe, loved and cared for
I hope this part of this assessment has been enlightening and helpful.
When you get a chance, take the next set of this assessment.
Keep the print outs for each so, at the end of the series,
you can trace your progress on your journey to
Co-Create a Conscious Relationship.
I hope you and your partner
Gain the Awareness, Learn the Skills and
Practice the Techniques so you are successful on your
Journey from I-TO-WE to live your lives as each others
Best Friends During the Day,
Lovers at Night, and
Partners for Life
2006 All Rights Reserved Glenn Cohen
I-TO-WE Relationship Coaching
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